A Little Bit of Seoul

These are some pics from around Seoul. It's pretty safe to say, notwithstanding some temples I've yet to visit, that as pretty cities go...it ain't. The most plausible theory I've yet heard is from a friend who thinks that a few years back they ran a competition on building design, one guy came up with a design titled "Unrelieved City of Lego" and they haven't looked back (...or up) since. Apparently any architect who builds in a curve or non-linear surface gets buried in the basement to discourage other such radicals.

Koreans are extremely good at functional. Things work well, on time and are extremely logical (except those digital toilets, I just wanna flush!!) but flair and creativity are often lacking.

Running through the middle of the city is a (enormously expensive) green strip and waterway, that for mine is an unconvincing attempt at beautification for the dollars spent.
The Jongno tower is a notable architectural exception. I was only mildly surprised when it transformed into a giant robot and started chasing me down the street.


Luckily this little guy jumped out, shouted "C'MON" and proceeded to kick it's steel and glass ass.

The statue below was erected after Seoul hosted the 1988 Olympics. I'm not quite sure how the topless chick and the guy with the sledgehammer relate to the spirit of the Olympics but apparently it has something to do with dealing with the IOC delegates.

Koreans love their scooters. I'm used to the smaller type of scooter but over here the line between a big scooter and small car is getting closer all the time. Boys being boys mean that many are modified with exhausts, tinting and other forms of bling. This one is Batman's personal scooter, he keeps quiet about it though as he doesn't want the other men in lycra to think he's a girl.

They're also mad about gadgets. Even the youngest kids in class sport the latest electronic consumables such as MP3's, handheld game machines, phones and PDA's - their phego is out of control.

Tell me the kid on the left doesn't look like he's squeezing one out for the fans.

Clearly the obsession with gadgets and electronics has a long and ancient history in Korea...

I had to call an ambulance after I told one of my classes that I didn't actually own a mobile phone and they simultaneously went into shock. Occasionally the kids are good for a laugh. I had to stop pretending that this one girl's pencil case (it was a panda bear with a zipper) was alive during class, it actually began to freak her out. She was looking at it as though fearful it was going to climb out of her school bag and stab her during the night.

Another teacher had a kid shit himself during class. Quite how you live that one down is beyond me. The funny part was when a teacher heard him on the phone saying "...mum, I did it again". Personally I think he should eat more bread and keep his guts to himself.

Some of the students don't let on how much english they actually know. For instance I had a little bit of a communication issue with a Korean hairdresser. I asked for clippers number 5 as I would in Oz but she thought I meant 5mm so I ended up with a pretty brutal crew cut. That afternoon one wag in class who hadn't said "boo" in 5 weeks, managed to somehow muster up enough english to say "teacher, your head is shiny". Yeah thanks smartarse, hope you enjoy repeating.

When the younger kids write english it's very common for them to transpose 'b' and 'p'. Seafood is very popular so you read whole journal entries about families going out and eating crap and how much they enjoyed it. Whatever makes you happy I guess.

Just recently I started Korean lessons, giving me a lot of empathy for the kids who find english difficult, although I had previously learnt the atypical traveller's essential phrases which I always like to say in sequence:

Hello/Goodbye.
Hey you, waiter!
Where's the toilet?
Thankyou.
One more beer please?
How much is it?
Do you want to die?

It makes for short, but colourful conversation.

I was criticised after my Hawaii blog for not providing sufficient "candid" shots from the beaches there. Here's a belated attempt to revive the interest of my male friends who stopped reading in protest after the Hawaii page.

Yes boys, she really does want you and only you, no really she does, she told me.

Speaking of ladies, here's proof that Will actually does wash his hands - even if it is in the women's loo. For some reason he wanted a copy of this photo to send to his mum. Weird but true.

Another poster child for the foreign teachers in Korea is Evil Nav who is struggling to make up his mind between global domination, spreading a wirus and an all day breakfast.

Never let a "mensch" deal.
Shitbeertravels. I was astounded to find XXXX in a bar in the very suburban suburb of Nowon, and have since experienced the liveristic trauma of seeing it in several other bars. I can't figure out, of all the good beers in Australia (my kingdom for a carton of Cooper's pale) why the hell they import XXXX. For those who haven't been subjected to XXXX, think of it as the unfiltered byproduct of a very thirsty donkey and you'd be on the right track.

Speaking of alcohol, Korean BBQ's are a favourite pastime. It's all based around a communal meal and funnily enough they're better with a bunch of Korean's. A typical dinner involve lots of shots and lots of fingers. If you are short some digits the waiters are more then happy to flip you a couple.
There are some nice social conventions surrounding the BBQ such as pouring for other people and the obligatory drinking games involving bottle tops and soju. Somehow they always seem to spiral out of control from polite dinner after Monday work to a 4am finish and the longest most painful classes of your short teaching career.

Indeed. That squirrel sure looks hammered.
Words for the day:

Phego: The pride one feels in having the latest and greatest mobile phone.

Wirus: Making up a word (see: phego, agreeance) and repeating it ad nauseum until it infiltrates into common usage.

Be well.